March 30, 2021

Miss Manners: Pity the poor biker man beset by ‘brazen’ women

This woman came up to me and said hi. I said hi back, and then she proceeded to ask me if I could take off my helmet — she said she wanted to see how old I was because the helmet always throws her off. I thought, “You have some nerve!”

I wonder what you would think, Miss Manners, if I walked up to your car window and knocked and said, “Hi, could you roll down your window so I can see if you’re pretty or young enough for me?” I bet that would go very well.

This isn’t the only incident that I have experienced with brazen women, but it is the most egregious.

Dating in the United States is one-sided. The average woman has 100 messages in her dating apps and the average guy has seven. It truly is a woman’s world, and us average guys are left feeling like we are on display, or like we are back in elementary school, hoping someone will pick us in a game of Red Rover, but never getting picked.

Please advise me where I can find a woman who values the content of my character more than the beauty that I have, which is only skin-deep.

The argument that this is a woman’s world — and that men are only regarded for their looks — is not going to gain much traction, Miss Manners is afraid. Nor make you any more popular.

However, it is true that no human, of any gender, should be treated as you describe. In your situation, you might have said, “I beg your pardon? My helmet is on for my own protection” and left the impertinent woman to ponder from what — or whom — you were actually being protected.

Dear Miss Manners: I live in a condo, and the upstairs tenants have three children. I understand that kids generate a lot of laundry, but on some occasions, they run their washing machine late at night and it interrupts my sleep.

I was going to write a note asking that they please refrain from using their washer after 10 p.m. because it is noisy and prevents me from sleeping. Is there a better way to say this?

With three children living above you, Miss Manners considers you lucky that only the late-night laundry is costing you sleep.

You might point that out in your note, thereby making it all the more gracious: “You and your children are so thoughtful and light-footed that it pains me to ask you, but would it be possible to run the washing machine during earlier, waking hours?” Then quietly rest up for the children’s adolescence.